<nettime> etoy.QUARTERLY-REPORT: BRAND-ALERT. XMAS2000. SEALAND...

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***etoy.HEADLINES***
1. TODAY! TV REPORT ABOUT THE etoy.OPERATIONS 2000 ON ARTE: 
"TRACKS" FRIDAY 13.10./ VPS 19.00 CET. FRENCH AND GERMAN. 
********************
2. QUARTERLY-REPORT 3/2000: TRADE-MARK VICTORY/eToys BATTLES/
BRAND-ABUSE/DR.GRETHER/SEALAND/CAYMAN ISLANDS. 
********************
3. FORWARD LOOKING STATEMENT Q4/2000: the etoy.CORPORATION 
feels fully prepared for the upcoming holiday season.
********************
4. UPCOMING etoy.PRESENTATIONS: 28.10: MILANO/ITALY, 
29.10: BASEL/CH, 3.11: MENLO PARK/CALIFORNIA, 
5.11.: GENEVA/CH, BERLIN XY.11. (not fixed yet)
********************



******DETAILS*******

1. etoy.TV: for all who missed the show "etoy.CORPORATION - 
IMPACT MANAGEMENT IN MANHATTAN": "TRACKS" tv documentation 
on the network "ARTE": this friday, after 7 pm broadcasted 
all over europe (satellites: TELECOM2B, HOTBIRD5, ASTRA1E, 
ASTRA1F & cable). REPEAT: DIGITAL ARD/ZDF-Bouquet 14.10.
info: www.arte-tv.com 

***

2. QUARTERLY-REPORT 3/2000 (excerpt): 

2.a) etoy.TRADE-MARK: a victory message from the TRADEMARK 
OFFICE IN ARLINGTON/USA! 1:3 for etoy. after a registration 
process of more than 3 years the mark no. 75/313707 "etoy" 
(stylised) registered for "twisted cultural business 
operations and experimental entertainment" got the final OK 
for publication! http://tarr.uspto.gov/servlet/tarr?regser=serial&entry=75%2F313707 
enemies and competitors have 30 days to oppose. the 
TOYWAR.site is reactivated! (NO! the etoy.CORPORATION is not 
particularly interested in repeating the famous 1999 net-
entertainment-hit "TOYWAR - most expensive performance in 
art history") it was not planned to launch a ranting trilogy. 
but! the art giant is READY TO PROTECT its property to the 
"MAXIMUM EXTENT UNDER LAW" if it is necessary. over and over 
again. (B.O.M) ...toby, you know what this means... right? 
creative engineers had plenty of time to work on protection-
weapons... thousand of soldiers and journalists are watching 
your steps. your shares are not doing too well... we better 
surprise the kids with peace and harmony this x-mas...  we 
both burned enough cash and had plenty of fun last time. btw: 
if you need a hand to save your business - we just heard that 
you had to leave your offices - give our lawyers a ring. we 
don't blame you for your sins of the past. we all do stupid 
things...(E.O.M.)

2.b) SIDE-EFFECTS OF A STRONG BRAND: as the etoy.EMPIRE grows 
it faces more and more trademark delusion, unauthorized 
products in china and embarrassing brand abuse in austria. 

2.b.1) last month local authorities confiscated 1400 faulty 
copies of the 1996 net-hit soundtrack "digital hijack" on 
flexi disks in hong kong. etoy.CEO ZAI explained that the 
records were about to be shipped to north america where 
more and more etoy.FANS are willing to pay up to 50 USD for 
a copy of the legendary piece of plastic. etoy recognized 
the lack of information and started a campaign telling people 
that they get the hijack sound disc for free by ordering 
a SPEX-ANNIVERSARY-SHARE-PACKAGE for only 20 USD. this 
package includes 10 etoy.SHARES, voting power, stickers and 
the etoy.SOUND-CD "TOYWAR.lullabies" (free tracks from EBA,
negativland, people like us a.m.o). http://www.etoy.com/SPEX . 
PRESIDENT etoy.GRAMAZIO: "the confiscated discs were 
distributed among computer game addicted kids in china."

2.b.2) more pitiful is the latest case in austria. industry 
insiders reported: the spam-mail-agency that "purchased" an 
american election site (after it was shut down by its founder) 
now plays an unsmart game. it promotes so called "shock- and 
guerrilla-marketing": the company tries to sell "art-editions" 
of cheap cars, promotes cloths and works for companies like 
microsoft germany. is this a problem for etoy? no. we did not 
think so. but fans informed us that the self-appointed pr-
masterminds signed with the official etoy.EMAIL-ADDRESS to
make their spam looking cool. what a brilliant masterpiece! 
a closer look to the website showed us that the agency calls 
etoy a "client and official partner" with the same 
"philosophy". etoy.FANS and SHAREHOLDERS - confused and 
disappointed that etoy is wasting its strong brand for low-
key business operations - complained. we don't like to get 
involved in a mudslinging. trademark problems are to be found 
under "risk factors" in our b.p. but as a shareholder company 
etoy is required to inform investors. here is the official 
etoy.STATEMENT: "the etoy.CORPORATION does neither work with 
those people nor does it support this kind of business-plans 
and urge everybody to risk their own asses for this sort of 
narrow minded crap. the etoy.MANAGEMENT is always open for a 
twisted deal. but shock-marketing will fail: no cultural profit 
- no long term revenues - no brain. etoy.LAWYERS feel so bad
about hunting down clowns who run spam mail companies and 
mimic very successful art brands. thank you very much for 
your cooperation!"

2.b.3) DR. GRETHER: on the net -as we see- its hard to 
separate real partners from swindlers. and sometimes the wrong 
guys pay while the liars make profit: after rumours appeared 
in certain newsgroups the etoy.MANAGEMENT likes to clarify 
the connection between etoy and dr. reinhold grether aka 
general nasdaq. dr. grether served as the hardest working and
best informed analyst of toywar. today he is a valuable 
member of the etoy.ADVISORY-BOARD. unfortunately his personal
and professional "enthusiasm" for the countless side effects 
of TOYWAR lead to misinterpretation by members of the 
community who had the impression that "oncle grether" jumped 
on the running train. etoy hereby declares that it fully 
covers dr. grether, wants to thank him officially for his 
efforts and hopes that we can continue the mind blowing 
friendship. dr. grether is an outsider, a controversial but 
very special person. etoy decided to cooperate with him 
during toywar because he was able and willing to learn, 
participate, observe and reflect the ongoing processes  - 
16 hours a day. he read 3 books a day for the last 30 
years. thats why you did not know him! he is not part of 
the theory-mafia and did not waste his time with "art 
world politics"...he came from nowhere. we like that. 
we know many "stars" who don't even know how to login. 
most of them never answered if we tried to make contact
...if we met them in person they recommended to take the 
money and run because they thought that toywar would fail. 
dr. grether was one of the few who recognized the meaning 
and full potential of this performance - long before the 
masses and the press came on board. his work as a 
scientist involved extensive research of the NASDAQ market 
and DER-NEUE-MARKT. the two tracks crossed at the right 
moment in history and run in parallel for some months 
before each party returned to its projects. we hope that 
open minded people will soon recognize that the grethers 
carry movements like toywar not the pseudo cool ones who 
always jump on running trains. anyway. even if he is 
exhausting some times - we like dr. grether and support 
his unorthodox research projects: www.netzwissenschaft.de


2.c) CORPORATE OPERATIONS Q 3/2000: etoy successfully 
launched its OFF-SHORE NET-SHELTER and electronic etoy.HQ-
PROJECT located on SEALAND -a former world war II anti-
aircraft military fortress in the north sea. the first 
data transfer is expected for Q 1/2001. BUSINESS REUTERS' 
Alice Ratcliffe reported "etoy plans a restructuring and 
has filed registration of a tax-exempt company in the 
cayman islands as it prepares to mark the first anniversary 
of the toywar". as announced in a press conference with 
TNC network the etoy.CORPORATION established the 
etoy.HOLDING on the cayman islands to launder dirty art 
money and to reinvest worldwide. day to day business now 
runs through the etoy.VENTURE association - a non profit 
organization in zurich/ switzerland. etoy.SHAREHOLDERS will 
invest through the etoy.VC /venture capital association 
which was incorporated earlier this month. 

the new company structure was established to guarantee 100% 
legal protection for institutions and business people. 
investors are no longer personally connected to the high 
risk units and therefore not liable for etoy actions. 

2.c.1) AWARDS: TOYWAR.com won a "honorary mention" at the 
ars electronica festival 2000. 

2.d) etoy.REVENUES: etoy does not promise financial 
revenues. etoy.SHARES represent cultural value. 

2.e) etoy.EXPENSES: during Q 3/2000 etoy burned about 50k 
of venture capital to cover its operations on- and offline. 
comparing to Q 3/1999 the cash-burn-rate is considered 
"under control".

2.f) etoy.LOSSES: losses are part of our business (compare 
section 2.d). losses do not matter as long as operations 
can be covered and as long as the shareholder-satisfaction 
is guaranteed. the etoy.MANAGEMENT is fully aware of the 
financial situation and guarantees payment of all 
legitimate bills. 

***

3. FORWARD LOOKING STATEMENT Q 4/2000: 

3.a) GENERAL: the etoy.MANAGEMENT expects that further 
venture capitalists, leading art collections (like the 
robert shiffler foundation/dayton/ohio in the 3rd quarter 
2000), institutional investors and many etoy.FANS continue 
to invest in the sophisticated corporate structure that 
generates and increases cultural value by inspiring 
business, entertainment and the art world.

3.b) Q 4/2000 PROJECTS: CONFIDENTIAL. 

3.c) Q 4/2000 INFRASTRUCTURE/etoy.AGENTS: the etoy.SHARE-
TRANSFER-SECTION (including all databases) is about to 
be reorganized. therefore the etoy.MANAGMENT cooperates 
with highly productive etoy.AGENTS in europe and the us. 
the etoy.TRANSFER project will be attended by alex fischl 
(newtron), lou wang, miss monorom.to, manuel gemperli,
olivier bron, andrea mayr, alain stamberger, and simon 
scheiber. we are proud that the project won their sympathy.

in the near future (Q 1/2001) investors will be able to 
buy the following etoy.SHARE-PACKAGES: 

-"BETA" (incl. voting rights, TOYWAR.cd, stickers)
-"FAN" (incl. v.r., tshirt, stickers, etc.)
-"AGENT" (incl. v.r., shareholder-card, etoy.EMAIL) 
-"PROTECTION" (incl. free gadgets: from bulletproof vest up 
to planed etoy.DATA-SHELTER located on the world's smallest 
sovereign territory, the principality of SEALAND).
-"V.C." (incl. v.r., etoy.FLIGHT-CASE, etoy.SUIT, sunglasses, 
etoy.CARD etc)
-"ART-COLLECTOR": (incl. v.r., etoy.SHARE-CERTIFICATE)
-"ANGEL" (chair etoy.BOARD)
-"TAKE-OVER" (51% of the etoy.CORPORATION)

3.d) INVESTMENT: minimal investment rates for the next 
quarter: etoy.MICRO-INVESTMENT-CARDS: $100, etoy.SHARE-
CERTIFICATES: $3000 (both certify ownership within the 
strictly limited pool of shares). special offer: etoy.SPEX-
ANNIVERSARY-PACKAGE for $ 20.

***

4. etoy.PRESENTATIONS OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 2000:

after presentations in linz, amsterdam and stockholm in 
september the etoy.CORPORATION decided to present the 
etoy.BUSINESS-PLAN in the following cities:
 
28.10.: "Creativo!" festival in MILANO/ ITALY with 
negativland, evolution control committee, emergency 
broadcast network (EBN) and others.

29.10.: "critics choice" du-matinee/ www.viper.ch BASEL. 

3.11.: Stanford Research Institute: "art frontiers: 
partners in art and industry" MENLO PARK/ CALIFORNIA  
http://www.thekitchen.org/artfrontiers.htm" 

5.11.: Centre pour l'image contemporaine/ GENEVA 
http://www.centreimage.ch/ 

BERLIN IS ON THE LIST FOR NOV.2000

***

ACTUAL RATES/ etoy.SHARE-PRIZE: $3.22 PER UNIT.


SIGNED - 13. 10. 2000 - www.etoy.com

the etoy.MANAGEMENT:
CEO: etoy.ZAI
PRESIDENT: etoy.GRAMAZIO
LEGAL AFFAIRS: etoy.KUBLI

     [image "q3xmas.jpg" omitted @ nettime]

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